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2024 Gratitude Challege – Day 7

This post will be somewhat more detailed than usual. While I aim to avoid political debates here, it’s important to acknowledge the recent election. For some, yesterday was a moment of celebration, while for others, it brought feelings of sadness and confusion. Observations from social media suggest that the divisive climate surrounding elections is expected to continue in the future.

Honestly, yesterday was just another day for me; the core of who I am hasn’t shifted. My commitment to acting with virtue, kindness, and fairness remains unwavering. Earlier this year, I shared my thoughts on the significance of discovering our common ground, and that message still resonates deeply with me. Let’s keep striving to connect and understand one another. Be grateful for our similarities and our differences.

The picture at the top of this post is from my garage. It reminds me that I have some recycling work to do. Additionally, we get a lot of packages at our house. Perhaps we purchased too much stuff.

While I support capitalism and the free market, I question how much consumption is truly necessary. Can you resist the temptation of excessive consumerism? Instead of indulging yourself today, think about treating someone else or contributing to a worthy cause—or both.

It is easy to praise providence for anything that may happen if you have two qualities: a complete view of what has actually happened in each instance and a sense of gratitude. Without gratitude what is the point of seeing, and without seeing what is the object of gratitude?—EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 1.6.1–2

Day 4 – 2024 Gratitude Challenge

As I take a moment to write this, I’m gearing up to spend a few cherished hours in the here and now, watching my beloved Minnesota Vikings. I know how important it is to focus on the present, which means setting aside the distractions of past regrets and future uncertainties. It’s a gentle reminder that being fully present can bring joy and connection. This was the challenge for Day 3.

It is also important to spend time reflecting on the past. We often overlook the true value of a moment. Consider the memories that brighten your life—what are the ones that make you smile, laugh, or even bring a heartwarming tear to your eye? Take a journey down memory lane and share those beautiful moments with your family and friends. Remember to reach out to those who played a part in creating those memories with you. Celebrate the connections that make those memories so extraordinary!

At the top of this post is a picture that holds a special place in my heart. It is from the Black Hills, a region I haven’t called home for a while. Nevertheless, the memories I’ve created there are vivid and alive, each serving as a beautiful reminder of the adventures and moments that have shaped me.

4 Years

As I post this, I will be on a reflective walk to remember a difficult time.

This is a story that many people have heard before. It all started on September 4, 2020, when my oldest brother tested positive for the Covid19 virus. This was a time when there were no known effective treatments or vaccines available. He had to isolate himself until he was no longer showing any symptoms. According to common wisdom, if you could make it through 11 days from the diagnosis without experiencing major symptoms, chances were that you would be fine. September 15 would be Day 11.

For the most part, I received good reports about my brother: oxygen levels were good, temperature was mostly good, and no breathing problems. I remained cautiously optimistic. We just needed to get to day 11.

On the afternoon of September 14th, I received a report that my brother was feeling a bit agitated and had a slight fever. He was given something to help reduce his temperature. I was disappointed he still had a slight fever as I wanted all symptoms gone. Unfortunately, this would be the last report I received.

At approximately 2:00 am, I was awoken by the sound of the doorbell and my dog’s barking. When I opened the door, I was met by a local police officer who delivered the unfortunate news that my brother had passed away in his sleep. Regrettably, he became the 200th person in South Dakota to succumb to COVID-19.

It’s been four years since this happened. This day brings up a lot of emotions, but most of all, I feel an overwhelming sense of sadness. I mourn the fact that my brother spent the last 10 days of his life in isolation. I grieve for the many who lost their lives to this virus. It’s heartbreaking that a virus became a tool for political gain. But above all, I miss my brother dearly. Although I didn’t visit him as often as I should have, he was always in my thoughts.

Memories of A Legend

A few days ago, I was saddened to hear about the passing of Phil Donahue. He was a trailblazing figure in the realm of daily television talk shows for close to three decades. Renowned for his timely and thought-provoking content, Donahue’s shows were not only engaging but also often sparked important discussions. One of his signature trademarks was conducting interviews while strolling through the studio, creating an interactive and dynamic atmosphere. His show was also known for actively involving the studio audience and taking phone calls from viewers.

Even though Donahue was talented, he wasn’t my preferred choice as an interviewer. In the photo above, Donahue is shown alongside my all-time favorite interviewer, my mother. I can still recall my mom’s infectious enthusiasm as she eagerly prepared for her trip to Chicago to meet and interview Donahue. After her return, her excitement remained as she vividly described the entire experience.

My mom had a real talent for connecting with people, whether they were everyday individuals or celebrities. Some might call me biased, but I truly believe she was even better at it than the famous talk show hosts. Luckily for me, being a mother was her true passion, and she excelled at that, too.

Even though I miss her dearly, I’m filled with immense gratitude for everything she brought into my life. The photo of Phil Donahue captures the same sentiment, radiating warmth and thankfulness. “With Gratitude”

Day 13 Beautiful Things

The power of music is undeniable. It has the ability to transform our emotions, making us want to dance and sing. It even has the magical ability to transport us through time by triggering long-forgotten memories.

This year, one of my favorite singers released a new single. Billy Joel has been creating incredible music for over 50 years. His latest single “Turn the Lights Back On” is amazing. Lately, I’ve been really connecting with this particular song. It’s filled with meaningful messages and is just so beautiful. If you want to experience it, you can watch the video by clicking on the link above, or you can take it in by reading the lyrics posted below.

Lyrics

Please open the door
Nothing is different, we’ve been here before
Pacing these halls
Trying to talk over the silence
And pride sticks out its tongue
Laughs at the portrait that we’ve become
Stuck in a frame, unable to change
I was wrong

I’m late, but I’m here right now
Though I used to be romantic
I forgot somehow
Time can make you blind
But I see you now
As we’re laying in the darkness
Did I wait too long
To turn the lights back on?

Here, stuck on a hill
Outsiders inside the home that we built
The cold settles in
It’s been a long winter of indifference
And maybe you love me, maybe you don’t
Maybe you’ll learn to, and maybe you won’t
You’ve had enough, but I won’t give up
On you

I’m late, but I’m here right now
And I’m tryin’ to find the magic
That we lost somehow
Maybe I was blind
But I see you now
As we’re laying in the darkness
Did I wait too long
To turn the lights back on?

I’m late, but I’m here right now
Is there still time for forgiveness?
Won’t you tell me how?
I can’t read your mind
But I see you now
As we’re layin’ in the darkness
Did I wait too long
To turn the lights back on?

I’m here right now
Yes, I’m here right now
Looking for forgiveness
I can see as we’re laying in the darkness
Yeah, as we’re laying in the darkness
Did I wait too long
To turn the lights back on?

Certainly Beautiful Day 1

Let’s always remember to find the beauty in the world, despite its uncertainties. Starting today, I will capture one beautiful thing each day for the next 30 days and share it.

These little ducklings jumped one by one on to this rock in pond. Mom swam close by occassioinly making a noise or two.

As Many With as Without


“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.” – Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities

 

Time is an interesting concept. Today is a day that marks a significant moment in my life. Many years ago, on this day, I was born into this world. As I grow older, I am reminded that each birthday is a precious gift and should be celebrated.

This weekend, I’m just not feeling the birthday cheer. It’s the eighth time my birthday has landed on a Saturday, and it always sends me on a trip down memory lane.

On a beautifully sunny birthday, I was enjoying a morning round of golf with two new friends in a new town. As we strolled off the green of our 12th hole and headed towards the 13th tee, a young man in a golf cart handed me an urgent note from the pro shop. Written in striking red ink, the note read, “Paramedics called. Call your mom at home.”

This was before cell phones became prevalent. As I was at the furthest point on the course from the clubhouse, I rode back to the clubhouse with the young man. While I did not know exactly what had happened, I knew this ride would be a turning point in my life.

As I reached the clubhouse, I called my mother and received devastating news. She informed me that my father had passed away and asked me to return home immediately. It was difficult to comprehend – I had just hugged him less than 12 hours before. It felt like a surreal and heartbreaking moment. The next day was Father’s Day.

I continue to feel a deep sense of sadness about my father not being here. I often find myself wishing he could have met my wife and sons, and for them to have had the opportunity to meet him.

Today feels like a significant turning point. My father has been absent from my life for as long as he was present. In recent years, I’ve pondered how I would feel. I can confirm that little has changed as I write this.

So forgive me if I don’t want to celebrate or play golf this weekend. Maybe I will have a shot whisky or glass of wine in his honor, but there won’t be a party.

March Sadness

March is a month of transformation and growth. It marks the shift from winter to spring, from darkness to light, and from barrenness to fertility. Moreover, for those who follow college basketball, it is the most thrilling three weeks of the year. At one time, I also regarded it as a month of change and evolution.

In March, I am reminded of what was. It marks her entrance into the world, her departure from it, and the cruel echo of her absence that reverberates most profoundly in my soul.

March 17 is a day of festivities, celebration, and joy for many Americans. However, on this day 18 years ago, what began as a typical day quickly turned when I received a call just before 8:00 am saying, “She is not doing very well; you should come.”

As I entered her room, my heart was racing with anticipation and fear. I could see her lying there, frail and weak. Without wasting another moment, I grabbed her hand tightly and whispered, “Mom, I am here.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, as if she had been waiting for me to arrive. It was a moment of profound sadness and unspoken love. As I stood there, trying to process what had just happened, I knew I needed my wife by my side. So, I quickly dialed her number and asked her to come.

“I hope you never hear those words. Your mom. She died. They are different than other words. They are too big to fit in your ears. They belong to some strange, heavy, powerful language that pounds away at the side of your head, a wrecking ball coming at you again and again, until finally, the words crack a hole large enough to fit inside your brain. And in so doing, they split you apart.” 

For One More Day – Mitch Albom

The next few hours were a whirlwind of emotions. Phone calls were made to family and friends to let them know about what had happened. Amidst all the chaos, there was one promise that had to be kept. It was St Patrick’s Day and we had promised our two-year-old son that he could watch the parade. Despite the heavy heart, we wanted to make sure he got to experience the joy and excitement of the parade. It was a bittersweet moment, knowing that our little one had no idea of the tragedy that had struck. It would be great if we could all take a break from the chaos and simply soak in the joy of a parade. Sadly, that wasn’t my experience. Even though my son was having a blast, I couldn’t shake off this feeling of emptiness.

As the years have passed since my mother’s passing, I have hoped that the feeling of emptiness would eventually go away. Unfortunately, it hasn’t. Every year in March, I find myself drawn to “For One More Day” by Mitch Albom. One of my favorite quotes from the book is “Sharing tales of those we’ve lost is how we keep from really losing them.” Therefore, I encourage you to share the story of a loved one who is no longer with us as you go about your day today.

The Streak

Since 2017, I have been using walking as my primary form of exercise and fitness. During that summer, I bought a Fitbit and started my fitness journey. That also marked the beginning of my obsession with steps. Over the next three years, I have walked so much that I had to replace my shoes multiple times. While walking, I listen to audiobooks and podcasts, which make the experience more enjoyable. Overall, I felt much better and healthier after incorporating walking into my daily routine.

I am determined to achieve at least 10,000 steps every day (approximately five miles). Before 2020, I used to accomplish this goal on most days. I am proud to have set multiple personal records, including 41,000+ steps in a day, 215,000+ steps in a week, and 715,000+ steps in a month. However, one record still eludes me – 365 consecutive days with 10,000 steps or more. Despite this, I am motivated to keep pushing myself and working towards this achievement.

Let me take you back to the beginning of 2020, a time when the world was full of hope and anticipation for a great year ahead. As for me, January kicked off with a trip to London, where I spent most of the month teaching a course on Brexit with a great colleague and a group of primarily enthusiastic students. Later that month, I flew back just in time for my oldest son’s wedding – a beautiful celebration with family and friends.

It seemed like everything was going smoothly when February rolled around, and the start of another semester loomed ahead. Despite the busy schedule, my wife and I had a San Diego trip planned for early March, and we were both eagerly looking forward to it. Little did we know that this trip would be one of the last normal things we would do for a while.

I totally failed my goal of walking 10,000 steps on February 29, 2020. I have no clue why it didn’t happen. That day, I went to an Augie basketball game and watched them lose by two points in the conference tournament, which was really sad. Maybe I was so bummed about the loss that I didn’t feel like walking at all.

Can you believe it’s been four years since I last missed my step goal? That’s right, February 29, 2020, was the last time I fell short, and since then, I’ve been crushing my daily target of 10,000 steps or more for 1,460 consecutive days. It’s been an incredible journey, and I couldn’t be more thrilled to have made it this far.

Although my memory is somewhat blurry, I recall that I had planned to begin a new streak on March 1, 2020. I was quite enthusiastic about it because our upcoming trip would have given me a good head start on my goal. Unfortunately, what I didn’t expect was the outbreak of a global pandemic that would bring about the shutdown of society.

From the very beginning of the pandemic, I committed myself to walking at least 10,000 steps every single day until the pandemic came to an end. I thought it would last for only six months, but as it turns out, it was a significant part of our lives for almost a year. But you know what? This has been one of the most exciting challenges I have ever taken up. Who would have thought the habits I started during that unprecedented time would become a permanent part of my life? It’s exciting to think about the positive impact this challenge has had on my life.

Every day, I kick off my mornings with a brisk walk lasting 30 to 45 minutes. Time permitting, I take another walk after work as well. Whether it’s outside enjoying the fresh air or indoors on a treadmill, I ensure that exercise is an integral part of my daily routine. I am committed to this routine, and breaking the streak is not even a remote possibility at the moment.

What streak are you starting today?

*The picture attached to this post was taken during a March 2020 walk along a San Diego beach.

Anticipation and Hope

While rewatching season one of Ted Lasso, I heard him say something inspiring to his team before a big game:

“So I’ve been hearing this phrase y’all got over here that I ain’t too crazy about. “It’s the hope that kills you.” Y’all know that? I disagree, you know? I think it’s the lack of hope that comes and gets you. See, I believe in hope. I believe in belief. Now, where I’m from, we got a saying too, yeah? A question, actually. “Do you believe in miracles?” Now, I don’t need y’all to answer that question for me… but I do want you to answer that question for yourselves. Right now. Do you believe in miracles? And if you do… then I want y’all to circle up with me right now. Come on. Let’s go.”

Last week, we celebrated the epic anniversary of the Miracle on Ice – an unforgettable moment in sports history when a group of young college men achieved the impossible by winning a gold medal and captivating a nation for two weeks. It got me thinking, does hope ever kill you? And what about the thrill of anticipation for an amazing experience? Can it ever be a bad thing? Let’s explore!

On Sunday, I was eagerly looking forward to Monday and the rest of the week. Since Monday was a holiday and the workplace was closed, I decided to take advantage of the good weather and make plans to go for a morning walk at a local nature area. After that, I planned to spend the afternoon reading and sipping tea. Luckily, the weather held up, the walk was wonderful, and I was able to finish reading my book. The anticipation and hope that I felt on Sunday turned into a reality on Monday.

As Monday slowly came to an end, I couldn’t help but feel an excitement for the upcoming Tuesday. It held the promise of a pivotal business meeting, a flurry of challenging tasks to tackle at work, and to top it all off, a thrilling college basketball game to watch. And boy, did Tuesday deliver! The day flew by, filled with a sense of purpose and accomplishment, just as I had hoped for.

As evening arrived, I was getting ready to watch the best college basketball team in the country, UConn, play against my son’s university team, Creighton. My son is good friends with many of the players, and I have also had the chance to get to know some of them. Watching them play, I often feel like I am watching my own family. However, my hope and anticipation for the game were wavering, and I began to have doubts, similar to what a long-time Minnesota Vikings fan might experience in the fourth quarter of most games. But in the end, the game surpassed my hopes as Creighton emerged victorious. It was two days where hope and reality perfectly aligned.

Recently, we have been eagerly anticipating our upcoming travels. One of the destinations we are most excited about is the Grand Hotel on Mackinac Island. Our first visit there was on our honeymoon, and we have returned several times since then. Even though we have been there before, each visit is unique and just as enjoyable as the first one. We can hardly wait for this trip and are looking forward to having a fantastic time. Only time will tell if our hopes and reality will align.

Upon reflection after a week, Lasso’s argument may have merit. The feeling of hope and anticipation could enhance the overall experience. What are you looking forward to?

I hope you have a great week.